I learned something very bad today. I learned it quite accidentally, mind you. I learned that my new stomach can be coerced into vomiting. Meaning, I was feeling really sick after I tried to eat something and I was leaning over the garbage can. While leaning, I coughed. So Feeling Sick + Leaning Over + Coughing = The Vomit.
I wish I could unlearn it. It’s dangerous to know this. All through high school, I wished that I was one of those people who could vomit on command. I know now how terrible that is for you, but I was 16. All I knew was I was tired of being the fat girl. The idea of bulimia was intriguing except for one little detail: I abhor vomiting so I could never bring myself to do.
Knowing that I only need to lean over and cough makes things much easier. I am not sure why this is even an issue since I had gastric bypass and have lost 37lbs in 34 days, but apparently the eating disorders die hard.
I’m here, I’m back, I’m technically fine. I had a minor setback last week. I was rehospitalized on the 14th for severe dehydration. I was so dehydrated it briefly affected my kidneys. As soon as I was rehydrated (they gave me 7 liters of fluid!) my kidney function returned to normal. All I do now is drink, drink, drink. I am drinking 3 liters of water every day to try to prevent the dehydration from happening again. It’s hard because The Vomitting™ has started. I’ve thrown up twice this week, which isn’t bad. I heard about a woman in the surgeon’s office who is all vomit all the time, so obviously, it could be worse. But since the focus is on staying hydrated, The Vomitting™ is obviously not helping that goal.
Oh, and also? There’s The Nausea™. Oh sweet lord, it is the most mind-bending nausea EVER, and it is often accompanied by physical pain which makes it that much more pleasant. Imagine, if you will, the sickest you’ve ever been. Perhaps a bout of food poisoning or a stomach flu. Then imagine someone parks a car on your chest and the tires of that car repeatedly stab you. That is what it feels like. I was supposed to start the Stage 4 bariatric diet yesterday, which is soft foods, but there is no way in hell. The Nausea™ is so bad when I eat something that I don’t even want to try.
These three phenomenon definitely go down in my Things I Wish I Had Known About the Surgery Before Having the Surgery book. Because really? I may have considered the lapband a little more if I had known that this part of the process was so rough.
In happier news, I have lost 31lbs in 3 weeks. I have to admit, that pretty much negates the trauma of The Vomitting™.
